Try To Compromise

Dear Joel:
I have been married to my second husband for about three months now. It is a second marriage for both of us. The difference between our former marriages is that he was divorced and I was widowed after 40 years of marriage. Once we married we decided that it was more practical for him to move into my home. We also decided it would be best to keep our monies separate.
Here is the issue. Shortly after moving in he asked me to put photographs of my former husband away. Joel, this is a man that I loved very much and feel very strongly about not putting family pictures away. I was happily married and have nothing to hide. When my children come to visit, I want them to look at pictures of their dad as I do of all of us together. Suggestions are appreciated as I don’t want to ruin new marriage, which I think it is a healthy one.

Answer:
Thanks for writing. The tone of your letter makes it sound as if you are a regular reader, just a guess I suppose. That being the case I try not to find right and wrong in stories. It helps neither party. What I would prefer to do here is suggest a compromise. One idea is to take newer pictures of your current husband and have those more prominently displayed throughout the home. Another idea is to take one room in the house and have all of your older photos confined to a smaller space. I hope this helps and would really like to hear back from you.

Joel

Questions for Joel? Email them to Joel@preferredcares.com.

Posted in Dear Joel